While the game of 21 requires plenty of concentration, it can’t hurt to crack a few jokes here and there. We take a look at some of the best blackjack jokes out there and the right time to whip them out – as blackjack players know, timing is everything.
On a roll
A player went to the blackjack tables and noticed another who was winning consecutively. He couldn’t believe how well the player was doing, and then looked down only to notice a piece of bread poking out from underneath his shoe.
Player: “You’re doing really well, but what is under your shoe?’”
Winning player: “Shh, I’m not a roll.”
This is a cheesy one and might not always work, but it is a good ice breaker and may set the mood of the table – especially if you aren’t with friends.
House etiquette
A player is seated at a blackjack table and has a hand of 12 when an argument is struck between the dealer and player about when to tip the dealer.
Player: “Why would I tip the dealer when the cards don’t depend on the dealer?”
Dealer: “Why wouldn’t you? In a restaurant you tip the waiter, don’t you?”
Player: “Yes.”
Dealer: “So you tip the waiter for bringing you food, regardless if it is good or bad, because it isn’t up to the waiter. Well this is the same for blackjack; the dealer delivers the cards but doesn’t determine whether they are good or bad.”
Player: “The waiter will bring me what I want though – so I’ll take a nine thanks.”
Human nature
A man visited Vegas with a group of friends and won over $100,000 on the blackjack tables. He didn’t want any of his friends to know about his winnings so he skipped out, taking his cash with him.
He decided to bury his money in a hole in his yard, but as he was doing so he noticed his neighbour, a deaf man who couldn’t talk either, watching him. The next morning his money was gone and knew it had to be his neighbour.
In order to find out where it had gone, he visited a professor who could translate sign language and brought him to his neighbours house.
Man: “Can you please tell the deaf man to tell me where all my money is, or I will kill him.”
The neighbour signs: “I have hidden all the money under my cherry tree.”
Professor: “I’m sorry, but your neighbour has said he would rather die then tell you where the money is.”
This is a longer joke but well worth it if you can tell it right – you’ll have all the players and perhaps the dealer laughing, if they haven’t heard it before.
Why Craps is bad taste
A friend of mine just opened a casino for canines. They can play blackjack, roulette, poker and all the casino games you can think of in the house – but they have to go outside for craps.
This joke can be considered poor taste, but we all have a group of friends who would get a laugh after a few drinks.
A true winner
A man comes home one day after visiting the casino after winning a million dollars on blackjack.
Husband: “Pack your things my wife, I’ve just won a million dollars.”
Wife: “What season should I pack for – warm or cold?”
Husband: “I don’t care what you pack, as long as you are out of the house by noon.”
It is probably best to tell this one at a table of male players, as the wives may not appreciate it.
Husband and wife
A man is playing blackjack with his wife for the first time, and she receives a hand of 12 while the dealer has a seven.
Husband: “You should Hit.”
Wife: “Why?”
Husband: “The book says so.”
Wife: “Where is this damn book you two keep talking about?”
More funny for you and the dealer when playing with someone new, then telling the joke, but the dealer or other more experienced players may get a kick out of this one.
Til blackjack do us part
News – “British man held after girlfriend’s death.”
Viewer: “He really shouldn’t be playing 21 at a time like this.”
You may not get a reaction from everyone, but diehard blackjack fans will enjoy this joke.
How Chuck Norris wins blackjack
Chuck Norris had a total hand value of 21, but still he asked for another card, and still he won.
Everyone enjoys a Chuck Norris joke, irrespective of how ridiculous it is.
Tattoos and blackjack
A player sits down at a blackjack table with a dealer.
Man: “My friend is a dealer. He has a tattoo on his arm of an Ace and a Joker. I’ve decided I’m going to get a tattoo of a 10 and a two. Then maybe later I’ll get another tattoo of a King.”
If you are seated at a table and no one is going too well, this joke may lighten the mood up a bit.
As you can see there are quite a few jokes around you can lighten the mood at the tables with, but we recommend getting a feel for the other players as some may not have the same sense of humour.